Purely Your Imagination

vera in context.

vera's johari

(ripped this somewhere which i think is really true!) ARIES WOMAN >> >>She thinks the world is watching her through the eye glasses of rose petal >>frame. She thinks people think and talk about her only about good things >>and often disappoint to know the fact that they are not true and not even >>real, so she will feel hurt. She think her path has to be a beautiful one. >>She >>think only good things so she prepares and always make arrangement for >>herself to be in the right path always, quite systematic indeed. >> >>If there is no guy in her life, she will be busy with herself. This >>seemingly ordinary woman will push herself to meet her goal. Her face >>mostly will be slim and long, high cheek bone, Eye brow slightly curve up, >>slight tall more than short, thin lips and she will have quite a confusing >>or mixture of character. >> >>Sometimes, she will be very careful about guy she will mingle with. She >>thinks as if she has a main CPU in her head and she could memorize >>everything from her childhood. When she faces with problems, she will >>handle them and solving them very well, and at the same time showing other >>people >>that she has that capability. She can put her mind in solving problems in >>crisis better than many other Zodiac. Once she determine to do thing, >>nothing will stop her. >> >>Woman in this Zodiac could be totally different from one woman to another >>woman. You could see her in the party dancing like flash dance or dirty >>dancing, as well you could also see her as an old fashion lady or a geek. >>She could be someone flashy and wanted by many men, or she could be a cold >>and non-social person. She will have her own way to win you over. Once she >>choose you, she will need to be proud of you. >> >>"Love" is not as important to her as "Marriage". Her real goal in life is >>"Safety" and her position in other people sight need to be "Secure". She >>plans her life, and socially life easily and very carefully. She is also >>very artistic and realistic, so if you are a nobody or nothing, no chance >>because she loves ambition and a good life. She need lots of love, but do >>not >>want and do not belief in an occasional or unconventional love. >> >>She is a proud in nature type, so if you see a woman in this Zodiac come >>from a poor family, she will act like a woman from a noble family by birth >>anyway (certainly there are always exception). She always look cool even >>when she is not. She like to make people see her as "secure and confident" >>even she is a mixed emotion and mixed character type. If she is mad, you >>can tell right away and she can stay moody for quite a long time. >> >>You never have all her times, for she likes to work hard and also spent >>some spare times working for charity. You will see woman in this zodiac a >>"Volunteer" for camp, and if she is in a high society, she will most >>likely be a president or a V.P. of a "Club". She is a romantic and >>artistic, but being poor and unstable is certainly not in her dreams. Her >>beautiful >>imaginations need to be realistic, for failure is not in her plan. >> >>A Goat always climb high, so either she start from a low point or a high >>point, she will make sure at the end she will have the best spot. She will >>not show her ambition, but she will show that she satisfy with herself >>now. Once you look back she already moved up again , quietly but sure. >> >>If she is your love one, be supportive and understand her. She is >>stubborn, but she will listen. She will act like a gentle fragile person, >>but in fact she can stick you down like a super glue without you knowing >>it.

i want/i need.

air. love. food. air. air. air.

the following is abstracted from ginny's blog. hope she doesnt mind i already have it copied here before permission granted. heh.

"My mother threatened to kick me outta the house last night. For the record, that's the first time. I wish she had more sense to make of herself at times and stop using emotional blackmail on me. I start a discussion with intentions to bring both of opinions together to form consensus but she always ends the discussion with her opinion and her statement. I'm so sick and tired of being charged by the crimes she place on me and lose any form of defence for myself. She just doesn't see how her kid knows the world as well and ain't a frog sitting beneath some well. She thinks i'm the stupid delinquent i was and has no inkling to what society entails. She's the paragon of wisdom and truth that what she says has to be it. Why doesn't she ever ask what i think and want? Well, because she believes i have everything i want already. Right.

You said i'd never understand till i plunge myself in a situation. Well, i plunged into a bloody college and hated it, did you see that? Did you comprehend those emotions that i've been going through? You claim to be liberal and modern but your actions defy the acceptance of new and radical ideas. So much for being a liberal mother. You still want me to get a fucking degree and land myself an office job thinking that's the best route for security in the future. I'd rather be a church mouse with dreams than a stable lady with no soul. I have absolutely no intention of selling my soul to this pragmatic world where people live their lives with lack of passion. The above statements might come across to be idealistic and naive to you and i personally have doubts at that thought at times but what the fuck."

i totally understand how she feels. i guess many people use the wrong approach to love someone. and it's one thing i've learnt that i will try my very best to not apply it on child-rearing in the future. see? i cant guarantee if i wont do it myself either. most times, people do things without realising the pressure asserted to another and forget the fact that they might not like it if they're pressurized the same way too.

i was watching some chinese show on tv the other day, starring one of Twins and xie ting feng(what's his eng name??) and edison chen...if i didnt rmb wrongly. edison and nicholas(oh!) are supposed to be good buddies in the police force then shit happened and they drifted apart and edison joined the bad guys but was betrayed and framed and got into big trouble with the police. and not having done anything 'memorable' or 'wei da' in his life, he decided to seek the bad guys for revenge even though he's got a pregnant wife(the Twins girl). then, on the night of the revenge, he went back home secretly to take stuff and overheard the conversation between his wife and nic tse. and i think what his wife said was damn nice. it went something like this:

'even if i can stop *edision from seeking revenge, i wont. if he is back, i'll encourage him to go. i'll say go on, i've my full support. cos if i stop him from doing so, he'll feel useless for the rest of his life. and though i'll have a secured family, that's not call love. that's selfishness. and because i love him, i'll give him my full support. i'll tell him that me and the baby will always be waiting for him. and if he really cant return, i'll tell the baby that his dad was a brave and good police man.'

pretty cliche and a bit to the extreme example, but i thought it is nice all the same. and since this, i've been pushing away all secret thoughts of not wanting tk to fulfil his dreams of studying all the way till professor degree. cos i kept thinking then we'll have to get married damn late and all tht nonsense. selfish right? he shall have my full support from now, as much as we are just friends now. =)

p.s. ginny, for the record, i was threatened countless times.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006 at 1:27 AM

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