Purely Your Imagination

vera in context.

vera's johari

(ripped this somewhere which i think is really true!) ARIES WOMAN >> >>She thinks the world is watching her through the eye glasses of rose petal >>frame. She thinks people think and talk about her only about good things >>and often disappoint to know the fact that they are not true and not even >>real, so she will feel hurt. She think her path has to be a beautiful one. >>She >>think only good things so she prepares and always make arrangement for >>herself to be in the right path always, quite systematic indeed. >> >>If there is no guy in her life, she will be busy with herself. This >>seemingly ordinary woman will push herself to meet her goal. Her face >>mostly will be slim and long, high cheek bone, Eye brow slightly curve up, >>slight tall more than short, thin lips and she will have quite a confusing >>or mixture of character. >> >>Sometimes, she will be very careful about guy she will mingle with. She >>thinks as if she has a main CPU in her head and she could memorize >>everything from her childhood. When she faces with problems, she will >>handle them and solving them very well, and at the same time showing other >>people >>that she has that capability. She can put her mind in solving problems in >>crisis better than many other Zodiac. Once she determine to do thing, >>nothing will stop her. >> >>Woman in this Zodiac could be totally different from one woman to another >>woman. You could see her in the party dancing like flash dance or dirty >>dancing, as well you could also see her as an old fashion lady or a geek. >>She could be someone flashy and wanted by many men, or she could be a cold >>and non-social person. She will have her own way to win you over. Once she >>choose you, she will need to be proud of you. >> >>"Love" is not as important to her as "Marriage". Her real goal in life is >>"Safety" and her position in other people sight need to be "Secure". She >>plans her life, and socially life easily and very carefully. She is also >>very artistic and realistic, so if you are a nobody or nothing, no chance >>because she loves ambition and a good life. She need lots of love, but do >>not >>want and do not belief in an occasional or unconventional love. >> >>She is a proud in nature type, so if you see a woman in this Zodiac come >>from a poor family, she will act like a woman from a noble family by birth >>anyway (certainly there are always exception). She always look cool even >>when she is not. She like to make people see her as "secure and confident" >>even she is a mixed emotion and mixed character type. If she is mad, you >>can tell right away and she can stay moody for quite a long time. >> >>You never have all her times, for she likes to work hard and also spent >>some spare times working for charity. You will see woman in this zodiac a >>"Volunteer" for camp, and if she is in a high society, she will most >>likely be a president or a V.P. of a "Club". She is a romantic and >>artistic, but being poor and unstable is certainly not in her dreams. Her >>beautiful >>imaginations need to be realistic, for failure is not in her plan. >> >>A Goat always climb high, so either she start from a low point or a high >>point, she will make sure at the end she will have the best spot. She will >>not show her ambition, but she will show that she satisfy with herself >>now. Once you look back she already moved up again , quietly but sure. >> >>If she is your love one, be supportive and understand her. She is >>stubborn, but she will listen. She will act like a gentle fragile person, >>but in fact she can stick you down like a super glue without you knowing >>it.

i want/i need.

air. love. food. air. air. air.

been feelin pretty good these 2 days ~ not that anything extremely nice has happened but i guess it's just this peaceful feeling i'm getting.. mayb cos nothing bad is happening? ha. or mayb cos the bad stuff in the last 2weeks has died down. been on a slackin, hols mood.. or possibly it's the good company i'm gettin - especially from my classmates.

wed was spent mostly at sandra's place filming for media arts. kinda like lazing around at her place, gives me this vacation mood and smoking outside her place gives this nice touchy edge, i dont know how to describe. peaceful yet erm...? *shrugs*
filming was hilarious. me acting as a nerdy, school klutz and running into raihan and spilling water at him and all.
then headed to ktv with eliza, sandra and raihan to do the night scenes as a ktv hostess.. flirty and poised. acting keeps people away from reality, being someone else completely different from the person we're and this person we so often wana be, for the moment is refreshing. you know, how we dont hafta watch how we're usually behaving, cos we tell ourselves, it's ok, we're acting.. it's ok, everything isnt real.

sometimes life can be an act too. how we laugh through our tears and tell ourselves everything is oh so fine cos we're enjoying ourselves for that moment. only to spill the tears behind closed doors when we retreat to the possilby true self.
often i ask myself what's being real and what's not. how do we act as ourselves and yet wonder if that's even us. or if we really have to drone on a certain feeling we may not wana feel at all.

anyw, after the shooting, sandra and i continued singing while raihan and eliza took their leave. we had quite a nice time, or at least i did. i enjoy sandra's company, possible cos she's someone louder than myself and being able to be the 'mellower' one sometimes, feels good. haha.

thurs was spent rushing kim's work, of which 60% i can honestly say, arent my own work. haha. so a grade of 66% was pretty ok for me. oh before i forget, i love slackin with eliza too. how we just plant our asses on the floor ourside sunshine plaza as though we're some street beggars yet eyed by the walk-ons like the art-farts. how we smoke out sticks dry and reaching for the next. how we dont hafta talk much but feel completely comfortable with each other...
and after class, eepei and i headed to PS. alternating our original plans to have the much looked-forward cheesecakes at ikea, we went on a food binging session and excused that for celebrating our own Valentines day since mine was a tad disappointing.
and yes, everyone, you have got to know eepei's bimboticity and spasticity!
"fuck lah, you're so blur lor. i'm gonna call you sotong from now."
she kept quiet for awhile, glaring at me. then breaking into a smile, she said,
"even if i'm a sotong, i shall be the most beautiful sotong you ever see."
"... ..."
and she has to go on...
"oh no, i should say, dont regret calling me a sotong ok! i'll be the most beautiful sotong in the world and you wont ever beat me!"

can someone please remind her how slimy, disgusting and smelly sotong are??? and they are fugly!!!! if you cant remember how a sotong in the market look like, think of the sea witch in little mermaid, it's just as bad.

on painting today, i'm starting to enjoy fine arts.
painting is like a relationship. you take risks, and you hafta be patient. you need skills and you play your emotions. you think it's just a trail, and it turned out beautiful. you decide to go for the actual one, it may not turn out as well. we pursue the best, yet when disappointed by the results and the things said and commented, you start to lose faith. yet, when you sense a sudden passion in it, you dont wish to give up so easily. you want to keep trying and trying till your energy runs dry. or hopefully till you're satisfied.
and the common goal, to have the superficial beauty we all have an image in our mind.
but does this beauty even exist?
or is it always, just in our mind?

on the girls i've been hanging out with...
sandra, i really understand the shit you're going through now though our situation may not be entirely the same. i too went through the phrase of wanting to believe that i can forget someone, whom i've loved so much and gotten used to be there for a year plus. sometimes, time may never heal, but trust me, love will heal all things. immense yourself in new a new love, be in materially or non-materially.
i love how you speak up for your friends to david and how we can always count on you when we need help in schoolwork. i love how dependable a friend you're and how you offer a listening ear at appropriate times-though it seems a tad difficult for someone who likes to talk so much. hehe.

eliza, i've found a new friend in you. i love how comfortable i feel just hanging out with you. i love how we have similar sentiments on various aspect and how you remind me of myself when i went through my own stage of growin out of teenhood. (not sayin that i'm that old, but ya, you get what i mean hor? haha.) i love how you'll stick up to your friends, and how loyal a friend you're. i love how you dont mind walking a mile just to accompany a friend in need-not that youve done anything like that, but the smallest things you do now, can tell that you'll.
and eliza, we're both in the same rocky boat. i wish you all the best in the guy you're...interested in? haha. well, tell yourself you'll walk away and move on, but do keep an open, yet close-guarded heart. i know very well you know what i mean and that you'll do just fine. =) whatever it's, however both our situations turn out to be like, always know, i'll always be there.

eepei, i love how you'll always keep a thought for me. how you look out for me and worry for me. i love how sweet a friend you're to everyone you know. i've never known anyone as thoughtful as you, how you'll always think of others before you. i love too, your bimboticity and spasticity! haha.
but please lessen your nags! i dowana feel like i'm out with my mom each time i'm with you. lols. eepei, dont forget every 16th feb of each year, we'll celebrate our own valentines hor!!!

and yes, happy belated valentines to all. attached or not, i hope u realise all kinds of love you can envelope yourself in on valentines day.

Friday, February 17, 2006 at 1:41 PM

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