my horoscope for today says:
The Bottom Line
Go exploring today -- take a wrong turn on purpose and see what you discover.
In Detail
That new, interesting person you've been told to expect shortly? How does today sound? Good? Great. Now, for the preparations: First, drag everything you haven't worn in forever out of your closet -- because you haven't been in the mood to wear something different -- and choose something. You're fishing for interesting, right? So dress interestingly. It's not like you're not brave enough to pull it off -- that's for sure. Next, last and most importantly: Be prepared for a 'coincidental' meeting.

but is this reading actually for 24th or 25th?? do they change the reading everyday at 12am sharp or actually during that day itself?

oh well. let's not take any chances. hahaha. i'm not desperate lah! just goind with the flow mah. (though i can almost hear cassan and xinyu and, especially nessa burst out laughing now. bah!!)


anyway, caught memoirs of a geisha on sat with nessa and i guess my mind was still so 'captivated' by the show(the auctioning her unvisited 'cave' for the 'eel' part. haha!!) that something someone said in the lift made me burst out in giggles.

scenario: very packed lift. everyone pretty quiet. then...

'that time i got bid by a girl.'
i turned around and saw a plump guy with quite a fugly face talking, and couldnt help it but burst a laugh. and from level 9 to level 3 i was shaking and shaking with laughter. not cos of the earlier reason, but cos of having found out that i've misheard.

after listening to the rest of his speech, i realised he actually meant 'bit' not 'bid'(and it should be 'bitten', not bit lor!!). see how disastrous it can get if your gramma is terrible? you get mistaken for being on auction and laughed at cos u dont look the least capable of being bidded. haha. ok, that is really very mean. but yeah, you got my drift?



anyway anyway, i think i'm gonna die of exhaustion. =(
schoolwork to be done this week:
-logo and namecard designs.
-5sets of eyes, nose, mouth, ear and hairline drawing.
-3sets of hands drawing in ink, charcoal and pencil each.
(fuck fuck fuck drawing class.)
work:
-working tomorrow 1-10pm.
-4 more pairs of shoes to rush to hand in by thurs, despite having completed 8pairs today.
-5 tees to design.
-dozens of accessories to be done.

someone please grant me 48hours per day!!! and gimme energy to last my week!

some random shit anyway.

-slipped and fall outside far east plaza today. fucken embarassing i tell you. right behind the stretch of of taxi-queuers. and i just sat there for a little and laughed along with my classmates who are so very nice. hurmp! so anyway, new resolution to add for this year: stop allowing my friends to be able to count the number of times i almost fall, and laugh at the time when i really do. (sandra said she counted 6times today that i almost fall before i realy did. fuck fuck fuck.)

-i just had a crap dream of my classmates going to a japanese resturant together... and, i was dreaming of eepei actually ordering a plate of bananas with sashimi when gwen's husband called and woke me. lols. some food fantasies i've got.

-i'm so so tired these few days my temper is flaring as easily as the easy stretch of the undies you buy 3 for $1. so please pardon me.

-oh yes, i was poisoned by 2butches last last night and i had diarheorr(dunno how to spell) the whole of yesterfuckingday. i'll go into that the next time. argh!

-i've been procrastinating again. hai. i need a 24/7 mentor.

-and i might need a chaperone too. haha.

-i wana go to the zoo oh-so-bad!!!

-and i just enjoy scouting. whee... =) but.

-ok, i need to sleep badly. night peeps.

from cassan's blog:
They say that sometimes, when people don't understand what you are saying, they may take it as something offensive against them. In view of this, i think i should speak only in english, so that even when i am cussing someone, that someone will know exactly what i am cussing.

Therefore, you are no longer a chao lao cheebye.

You are a foul antiquated vagina.repeat after me. you foul antiquated vagina. foul antiquated vagina. foulantiquatedvagina. foulantiquatedvagina. foulantiquatedvagina. foulantiquatedvagina.foulantiquatedvagina.foulantiquatedvagina.foulantiquatedvaginafoulantiquatedvaginafoulantiquatedvagina!!!

knn. is it me? or does cheebye roll off the tongue so much easier?


definitely the latter. as asked by justin if i'd prefer scolding stale shit or cheebye. not a matter of preference, cheebye just rolls of the tongue like nobody's busniess. i'm scolding so much of cheebyes nowadays nessa says i'm starting to sound like a LC chao ah lian. and that's the worst thing to take form, i swear. ok, after a lao cheebye of course.

see!!! again! i tried. man, this is hard.

i had a good day.
love myfriends to bits.
like the fried bacons cassan cooked!! =)

list of I HATES
1. lizards.
2. my smelly feet.
3. consecutive raining days. bah!
4. birds.
5. ANG MOs. (the think-they-are-high-and-mighty foreigners)

*no. 4 & 5 can be subsequently linked when appropriate.

i hate hate hate hate angmo. who do they bloody think they are! cocky, arrogant and think they're oh-so-great, walkin over the asians without fucking thinking where they are parking their cheebyes and lanjiaos.

i hate it when angmo ah-pek-going-to-be come up to me and say, 'hey beautiful, i thought we might be friends and see how it goes from there.'

PLEASE. MAKE FRIENDS WITH YOU, A FUCKEN ANG MO?? I'D RATHER WATCH PAINT DRY.

please fuckin have some brains. though, as much as i'm ashamed to say, some girls do spoil the asian girls image by drooling and panting over almost every angmo guy(even the loser type ones), not ALL will be flattered by a pick up line as cheesy and cliche as 'hey beautiful.' because,
1. i know i'm not beautiful compared to the girls you've in your fucken country and i know you only "think" i'm "beautiful" cos you cant get the real beautifuls in your own country and that sums you up as a LOSER.
2. please dont think 'hey beautiful' is the most wonderful thing one can ever say to us, asshole.
3. 'hey beautiful' belongs to YOUR generation, which btw, happen to be my dad's or even my grandpa's.
so, FUCK OFF.

dont you dare think that you can come to our country for some cheap fuck, pat your saggy bloody ass and think you're hot and sexy here. because back in YOUR COUNTRY, you're nothing more than a balding and beer-belly sprouting old dick, you WILL STILL BE anywhere else.

and dont over-rate yourself and think it's appropriate to hold my hand to grab my attention. not because i'm a traditional or down-to-earth girl(not that it's anything wrong tho), but BECAUSE:
1. i dont want to dirty my hand with your 24/7 used-for-masturbating hands.
2. you're such a turn off that even the thought of your hands touching mine, makes me wana puke my intestines out.
3. you're ang mo. full stop.

i hereby swear that the next angmo who approaches me, will be made to feel as shit as the piece of shit they are in their country.

and another fuck up happening that involves these assholes.

my grandpa fetches me to school, so cos it was raining heavily when we reached my school, gramps drove right into school to drop me off where there's shelter so i dont get wet. my gramps is very very nice and sweet, yes?

but you know what, someone as nice and sweet will always get bullied by the fuck ups in this world.

we drove to the only sheltered part where my gramps can drop me, which is about a car and a half lengthed. a van was parked in front of my gramp's car, occupying 3quarter of the sheltered space. so only meaning to 'alert the driver that there's a car behind his van, so if he's gonna take any longer, can he please shift his van for a little while so the people behind can alight', my gramps sounded his horn.



upon seeing us there, the security guard went into the office which is very near the drop off point to get the driver out. so needless to say, the selfish driver is an angmo. and this fucken idiot could have just signal to us nicely to 'please wait a little while', but he didnt.

he stood in front of gramps car and went all cocky and fucked up with his bloody attitude. started gesturing in a very exaggerated n cocky manner, 'wait! cant you wait, you asian fuck?!' and his gestures went on and on, not just like once to get his point across but over and over. and the last straw was that he was directing all these gestures at gramps and even mouthed, 'old fuck.' at my gramps lah. i flared up.

bloody fucker, you wana KL n SL in my country you shoot your ugly dickface back to your country ya!

so pissed off i was that he was 'bullying' my gramps, i flashed my middle finger at him and mouthed 'shut. the. fuck. up.'

for awhile his face registered a wee bit of shock then he continued gesturing something like, 'ho, let's see who's better.' and he proceeded to walk slowly back to the office. i was gonna be late for meeting wan so i had to jump out of car-which i've been meaning to when my gramps first drove me in. (i thought it's just a very small distance wont get that wet, but it was gramps who insist and insist that i wait.)

anyway, after i came out of car and got pretty wet, the angmo emerged from the office and started walking to hsi van. and this is where the nice part comes in. =)

my family is known for not to ever allow people to walk over us *prideful smile* haha. so my gramps purposely drove his car and park beside the right side of the van so the angmo had to get into the van with difficulty. and he couldnt drive his van out cos my gramps had the time of his world. =) so poor dick, started horning and horning and my gramps?

my gramps gestured the 'wait' sign. and smiled.

caught elizabethtown a 2nd time today with eepei, justin, zack n wan at cineleisure.
i really like the show though some might find it boring or so.
but what i feel bout this show is best described by shaiful:
-it's an acquired taste.
-if you think a movie that has small stories in it and think its called a no direction movie, then its not for you
and actually, the movie's been trimmed from its original 2 hr 30 mins. it is so badly edited lah, like cut off all the wrong parts. the 2 hr 30 version would've been better explained the whole show and make it nicer and sweeter in ways.

anyway anyway, first time i caught it, i super love love the company. =) spotting the dances that we too do when no one's around and how we hang our legs away with no care of exposed knickers. ha. so much fun on fri and sat with nanapok...

1/8/20062:11:04 AMTWL;
but really, this two days have been gd

im grateful cos

u really helped shake off the neg shit from work n all


with pleasure (and pressure). haha, jus kiddin. me love u heaps!!
oh and thanks for the best written testimonial from you..

You're an anchor to an essence that is twl.
Last night was mine to keep.
-- adapted;Skirts that hang where they ought - in de rigueur,
Nursing the obsession for retail&Ghetto gold,
The usual chow of cesarsaladsalmon,Bumming a ciggie in the drizzle of rain
and
Cinematic downtime with leg hung over (in your case, stuck between) backsits
without a care for revealed knickers.
Come monday, I'm going back to PAUL.


=)

finally, the strength for this entry.
on 2005, i broke 3 hearts and 1 more at the start of 2006.
yeah, i think i did change a lot in 2005.
changed to someone more strong-headed, more...more...sigh.i really dont know actually.

here's a song i really like. the checked ones are stuff i've got myself doing in 2005, a small re-cap on how i've changed, perhaps?

everybody is free(to wear sunscreen)
Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. check. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. check. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you. check.

Sing. check.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.* Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. check.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. check. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. check. Forget the insults. check. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. check. Throw away your old bank statements. check.

Stretch. check.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. check. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. check. Use it every way you can. check. Don't be afraid of it check. or of what other people think of it. check half for e few times when i do. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. check.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. uh, check? They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. check. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. check, fuck. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. check. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. check. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

*whenever this song comes up to these lines, i feel a tug of guilty. a big tug. i dont put up with people who are reckless with my heart. but i think i've been reckless with others'.
can these people learn to not put up with my being reckless with them? i dont think so. i think i seem to have been born with the legendary male genes, the let go and forget thing come a tad too easy for me.
i do kid myself with silly reasons like aries are known to be flicker-minded and impulsive. i bet the guys are going, 'oh fuck it.' yeah, it's ok, i'm saying that to myself too.

so on the top of my 2006 resolution list will be:
1. stop being reckless with other people's hearts.

2. be single. at least till i find my 'full real self'. or till i'm very very sure that it's worth a try-thus,
3. slow down on relationship progression aka stop jumping into relationships. be really really slow.
4. be more focus in school and business. stop procrastinating either work till last minute. that shit almost killed me in 05.
5. believe in "you're not as fat as you imagine", though nessa will kill me on this. she's been telling me how much i seem to have been 'heck-caring' my weight pile on and that i should do something bout it. ha.
6. start worrying about double chins. =(
7. spend more family time.
8. try to be neat n tidy-in my room.
9. be more tolerant towards my parents' moodswings.
10. stop swooning over Daniel Wu. start swooning over daniel wu-lookalikes. (haha, kidding. filling up 10 for 'perfection'.)



and lastly, a small note to...
firstly, tk.
thanks for the times we had. you're still the one i loved the most. thanks for being there through all sorts of my family shit. thanks for pulling me up on my darkest times. thanks for changing me into someone stronger and less-reliant, esp on boyfriend.
if ever our paths might cross again in the future, and if both our wounds have healed, we might have a go again.

wan.
thanks for bringing big laughters into my life again, and for the period where i did laughed my hardest in 2005.

kooichi.
thanks for giving us a try anyhow. i know how much you've been cursing for letting go of your guard and allowing me into your life. i'm sorry it didnt work out.

and, gene.
thanks for a fairytaled christmas. thanks for being the nicest. and sorry that not all fairytales end well.

a little re-cap of 2005 =)
1.momo-ed.






hahahaha. ok, i'm yawning badly. i'll feelFILL this soon!
you, see? i'm not in the right mode for this.
i even told cassan an elephant would hump her.

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
kns. i will tell the elephant to look out for u and spray water...

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
ya, that's if u approach the right gender. the male one will definitely find u so hot that he humps u. heh

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!! i will die on the spot!!!!!!!!!!!!!

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
hahahahahahahahah. i jus realised the size diff

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
what brains i've got

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
cheebye split open man! if he manage to get it in first.

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
while trying he'll trample me to death lor!!!!!!!!!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
it's like.. waht? the size of me???!!!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
precisely. WHAT brains???

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
eh, dont take pride in sayin that! u'r not the brains either! u'r pinkie!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
hahahahahhaa.

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
http://www.zoo.com.sg/events/weddings_photoopportunities.htm

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
scroll down. look at the yellow box. see the words there???

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
i read... OUTDOOR SODEMNISATION!!!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:

*SODEMISATION

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAA

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
wtf!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
i got a shock lor!!! lolol.

been making merry and gained much weight. i dont want school to start! =( says:
all that talkin bout elepahts humpin u has gotten u horneh huh! lols.

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
noooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
hahahahahaa.

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
eh. go botanical gardens if u can... go to e national orchid park.. entry is 5barks. DAMN NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Laughing things off makes it easier dosen't it? says:
u feel like fucking in there cos it's so nice and so quiet!! hahahaa


heh heh, that's cassan for u. i love her in heaps. so goes for xinyu, joy, vanessa, eepei, eliza, sandra, jeanne and uh. i'm blabbering. okok, really. a proper entry soon! =)