vera in context.
vera's johari
(ripped this somewhere which i think is really true!)
ARIES WOMAN
>>
>>She thinks the world is watching her through the eye glasses of rose petal
>>frame. She thinks people think and talk about her only about good things
>>and often disappoint to know the fact that they are not true and not even
>>real, so she will feel hurt. She think her path has to be a beautiful one.
>>She
>>think only good things so she prepares and always make arrangement for
>>herself to be in the right path always, quite systematic indeed.
>>
>>If there is no guy in her life, she will be busy with herself. This
>>seemingly ordinary woman will push herself to meet her goal. Her face
>>mostly will be slim and long, high cheek bone, Eye brow slightly curve up,
>>slight tall more than short, thin lips and she will have quite a confusing
>>or mixture of character.
>>
>>Sometimes, she will be very careful about guy she will mingle with. She
>>thinks as if she has a main CPU in her head and she could memorize
>>everything from her childhood. When she faces with problems, she will
>>handle them and solving them very well, and at the same time showing other
>>people
>>that she has that capability. She can put her mind in solving problems in
>>crisis better than many other Zodiac. Once she determine to do thing,
>>nothing will stop her.
>>
>>Woman in this Zodiac could be totally different from one woman to another
>>woman. You could see her in the party dancing like flash dance or dirty
>>dancing, as well you could also see her as an old fashion lady or a geek.
>>She could be someone flashy and wanted by many men, or she could be a cold
>>and non-social person. She will have her own way to win you over. Once she
>>choose you, she will need to be proud of you.
>>
>>"Love" is not as important to her as "Marriage". Her real goal in life is
>>"Safety" and her position in other people sight need to be "Secure". She
>>plans her life, and socially life easily and very carefully. She is also
>>very artistic and realistic, so if you are a nobody or nothing, no chance
>>because she loves ambition and a good life. She need lots of love, but do
>>not
>>want and do not belief in an occasional or unconventional love.
>>
>>She is a proud in nature type, so if you see a woman in this Zodiac come
>>from a poor family, she will act like a woman from a noble family by birth
>>anyway (certainly there are always exception). She always look cool even
>>when she is not. She like to make people see her as "secure and confident"
>>even she is a mixed emotion and mixed character type. If she is mad, you
>>can tell right away and she can stay moody for quite a long time.
>>
>>You never have all her times, for she likes to work hard and also spent
>>some spare times working for charity. You will see woman in this zodiac a
>>"Volunteer" for camp, and if she is in a high society, she will most
>>likely be a president or a V.P. of a "Club". She is a romantic and
>>artistic, but being poor and unstable is certainly not in her dreams. Her
>>beautiful
>>imaginations need to be realistic, for failure is not in her plan.
>>
>>A Goat always climb high, so either she start from a low point or a high
>>point, she will make sure at the end she will have the best spot. She will
>>not show her ambition, but she will show that she satisfy with herself
>>now. Once you look back she already moved up again , quietly but sure.
>>
>>If she is your love one, be supportive and understand her. She is
>>stubborn, but she will listen. She will act like a gentle fragile person,
>>but in fact she can stick you down like a super glue without you knowing
>>it.
i want/i need.
air. love. food. air. air. air.
sounds of familarity.
the clamour of vehicle engines roaring to life.
the churning of the garbage truck nearby.
the indie shoutings of 'hey-oh!'
the vibrates of the grass-cutting machines.
and, the birds chirping like fucken horny assholes.
then the silence.
blast some soft rock into my ears.
danced a little slow dance for myself.
havent been an early bird in ages.
thankful for the hang over that didnt come.
drank a little too much than intended last night.
so much better feeling, now that the drama-rama has died down.
the outside life look vanishes in the middle of the night.
my jacket pulled tight to cover those un-brassiered tits.
the fraying side of my top tied together to cover the big hole at the back.
shirt tucked in tight to keep my flesh from showing.
cigarette pack shouting manhood in my jeans.
wildness of hair disappeared in a pony tail.
the sex pot turns 'cinderella' with a curfew to follow.
oh no, i lack of the familiar hug from a friend.
tk, who's been through the most of my family ugly shit with me.
no no.
not the family ugly shit.
the adventures of the girl who doesnt like life mundane.
the wild-doings of this rebellious chick.
the pain in the family my mom longs to kick.
the heartache and disappointment of the kids my dad feels i am.
sigh.
how long more are you gonna keep me caged, my dear parents?
and what good will it do?
sooner or later you'll hafta...free the bird..
"more birds, more luck!" -sorry i just hafta do this. ha!!i'm not a child incapable of looking after myself.
i do take pride over my bit of smartness.
"ahem"
my friends aren't the evil lot,
nor are they way 'bad',
and we do take good care of each other well.
what are you so afraid that i might do out there?
or is it just your reputation at stake?
dont like the neighbours' wagging tongues that your daughter is a wild chick outside?
afraid your friends might see your daughter disgrace yourself in pubs?
what are your friends, if they're in your book of 'goodness', doing at that wee hour anyway?
a nightwalk? or sleepwalk perhaps?
or maybe you're afraid that i might lose myself.
get raped or robbed or killed.
this is singapore.
ok, not a strong statement enough.
this is not a hongkong tv serial.
alright, that was dumb.
thing is,
if i'm not out there,
i'll never know.
i'll never learn.
for i've never experienced.
and this life i'm leading,
it's mine.
i choose my path,
and i embrace even my mistakes, well.
what are you worrying about?
worry about your own lives that still lie ahead of you!
for i'm accountable for MY own life.
no, i will.
yes yes.
i'm talking back.
i've grown and i can fly now, you say.
no no.
not with you still stepping onto my tail.
how much further could i have flewn?
though i do not like to compare myself to the likes of birds.
did i mention how much i hate birds anyway?
Thursday, December 29, 2005 at 9:44 AM
Y Y Y
hey guys. something i find so true to my heart. here's an interesting read for all singles like eepei and joy! :)
let's take our time to find Mr Right...Unfolding To Others
The Journey Of Finding A Relationship
Before we embark upon the journey of finding the relationship that is right for us, we may want to take the opportunity to refine our concepts of who we are and what we want from life. That way, we are clearer on the kind of person we want to attract into our lives.
Part of the journey of finding a mate is learning how to become our own mate. When we can learn to meet our needs without relying on someone else to complete us, we don't have to form relationships from the space of needing our emptiness to be filled. We can also discover our intrinsic value, separate from what someone else might be reflecting back to us. Getting to know who we are and learning to love ourselves creates a solid foundation of self that we can bring to any relationship.
We are fortunate to live in a time when relationships can take on unique forms and unfold at a pace that is right for us. Friendship, dating, open relationships, long term relationships, long distance relationships, or committed relationships - we are free to choose the kind of relationships that we want.
If you want to be in relationship, but haven't found the right one for you, remember that the universe works in perfect order. Maybe all this time alone has been part of your preparation period for meeting your intended partner. Even the relationships in our lives that haven't worked out as we had hoped serve us by teaching us to make better choices in our next relationships.
Finding the relationship we want can come early or later in life. It may even happen again and again in one lifetime. There is no right or wrong for how to find a relationship nor is there a timeline that you have to follow.
Follow your heart, listen to your inner voice, continue to become your own soul mate, and stay open to love. Remember that the journey of finding the right relationship begins with being in right relationship with yourself.
vera. the one who's always been optimistic about love. =) the one who's found new love.
that aside, here's a little note to the girl whose msn nick has been questioning what christmas is.
i may not really know the exact meaning of what christmas really is. it's been widely told that christmas is about giving and joy and peace, etc. thing is, christmas has became such a widly commercialised festive that people stop recognising it as its original reason of celebration.
stop being slaven to this materially commercialised world. though they say having a good christmas is to spend it with your loved ones. christmas does not necessary mean doomsday when you're not attached, for your loved ones may well be friends and family.
to me, christmas is a day i embrace what i have in life, what has been blessed to me. and only me. the good and the bad. i reminisce the good days but will not dwell on the bad days.
stop being upset because you cant let go of a certain relationship. (though i know it's really easier said than done.) be glad it happened, even when it's ony for awhile. find small things to be happy about. it just takes this much to step out of your unhappiness. and you know, your friends, especially me, will always be there for you.
and please, dont be rid of the present you've for me. i want it, badly. i know i've already got the best present in years by Santa himself, but what harm is there for another? =)
lastly, love yourself like no one else will. you'll go through life learning that no one loves you better/more than you yourself can/do.
from me. who loves you in heaps too, my dear friend.
Y Y Y
THIS IS GONNA BE A LOOONNNG ENTRY.
Wednesday, 21st Dec 2005as said in previous entry, eepei and i got wasted that night. went to zouk mambo night(first time, haha), totally loved the atmosphere there, everyone was so wild and crazy and the music retro and funny. just makes us wana go 'oh-oh' and dance a hell of a night.
but eepei's friend, sam, had to think we are frequent clubbers and buy us a strong drink of long island. and eepei n i were oblivious of it, so wantin to finish the drink so we can get rid of the jug to dance, we drank down the whole jug in less than 10mins man. not forgettin the free shots we had earlier from some stupid guys who felt too rich. haha.
and yeah, as said, we got wasted and puked the whole night.. and eepei had to stay over my place.
sigh. stupidest thing i've done this year, besides the hp sacrifice. ha.


sam took these photos of the freaks of the year.
Thursday, 22nd Dec 2005
ikea madness with eepei. we had the most fun there this christmas week. still a little hang over from the previous night. ikea has got the best food at affordable prices! she had steak while i had salmon and we shared a cheesecake which is the best i've tried, recommended by miss nanasa-i miss her heaps too! =(
the following explains what we did after dinner...
i think eepei is in love with me!






oh, i'm more in love with her! =) (and no wonder why!)













and so we deserve each other! heh.



(last 2 are in courtesy of the guy beside us who's kpo enough to offer to take our pics. ha)
the lights.

and the craze begins..

pilling on with our goods. heh. and this lil boy who's already feels very at home to lie around.



diminishing.






you see why i love you so?



yes you, my dear friend. i (heart) you heaps.


















maybe we were still on high. haha!


i love food. =) how bout you for my food?


if only we've got a frog prince to kissy. eepei is greedy, she wants 2!










mirrors mirrors on the wall.












just that 101 things we want this christmas! heh.
and finally... if Yan can cook, so can I!!!
Friday, 23rd Dec 2005met up with shaiful to catch king kong and was late for the first half hour. the show isn't all that fantastic. storyline was quite a disappointment, too many loopholes here and there. then again, they say it followed that of the old version made. so i guess we cant very much complain.
met up with eepei for dinner at mos burger after movie. mos burger has become a fave these days. haha, with the corn soup and the ice milk tea and the cheesy burger, you wouldnt be surprise, would you? so yes, again, i had all 3 mentioned above and fries. explains why i'm piling on the weight. *sigh*
after dinner, was christmas lightnings photography. heh. again.





mr chaota santa!


will u be mine? =) ok good, let's go!






the christmas lovers.


Saturday, 24th Dec 2005christmas eve afternoon was spent with joy in town. had dinner and did exchanging of gifts.. she made me this bag of cookies that is so delicious!! and mine's the only special one, with one cookie that's all covered with chocolate chips and the other with my name written on it. so sweet!!! =)
see see!


my fave!





see the cookie guy?? i broke it's head! =(
met up with eepei at about 6ish and headed to CHC for their christmas service. quite enjoyed the drama they put up, very hilarious. but of cos, as usual, i hate the last part where they asked people to come forward and all. but i must say, pastor kong is a very good salesperson. with his eyes closed and everything, he can tell people that he sees hundreds of hands raised up when i merely saw a few tens. *shrugs*
joy had me convinced to go to her friend's family chalet at pasir ris after service, so i dragged eepei along, where i think, she didnt have that much of a fun? i'm sorry dearie..
however, i'm happy for myself to have gone to the chalet else i wouldnt have met santa's best present to me. =)
Tuesday, December 27, 2005 at 12:48 PM
Y Y Y