Purely Your Imagination

vera in context.

vera's johari

(ripped this somewhere which i think is really true!) ARIES WOMAN >> >>She thinks the world is watching her through the eye glasses of rose petal >>frame. She thinks people think and talk about her only about good things >>and often disappoint to know the fact that they are not true and not even >>real, so she will feel hurt. She think her path has to be a beautiful one. >>She >>think only good things so she prepares and always make arrangement for >>herself to be in the right path always, quite systematic indeed. >> >>If there is no guy in her life, she will be busy with herself. This >>seemingly ordinary woman will push herself to meet her goal. Her face >>mostly will be slim and long, high cheek bone, Eye brow slightly curve up, >>slight tall more than short, thin lips and she will have quite a confusing >>or mixture of character. >> >>Sometimes, she will be very careful about guy she will mingle with. She >>thinks as if she has a main CPU in her head and she could memorize >>everything from her childhood. When she faces with problems, she will >>handle them and solving them very well, and at the same time showing other >>people >>that she has that capability. She can put her mind in solving problems in >>crisis better than many other Zodiac. Once she determine to do thing, >>nothing will stop her. >> >>Woman in this Zodiac could be totally different from one woman to another >>woman. You could see her in the party dancing like flash dance or dirty >>dancing, as well you could also see her as an old fashion lady or a geek. >>She could be someone flashy and wanted by many men, or she could be a cold >>and non-social person. She will have her own way to win you over. Once she >>choose you, she will need to be proud of you. >> >>"Love" is not as important to her as "Marriage". Her real goal in life is >>"Safety" and her position in other people sight need to be "Secure". She >>plans her life, and socially life easily and very carefully. She is also >>very artistic and realistic, so if you are a nobody or nothing, no chance >>because she loves ambition and a good life. She need lots of love, but do >>not >>want and do not belief in an occasional or unconventional love. >> >>She is a proud in nature type, so if you see a woman in this Zodiac come >>from a poor family, she will act like a woman from a noble family by birth >>anyway (certainly there are always exception). She always look cool even >>when she is not. She like to make people see her as "secure and confident" >>even she is a mixed emotion and mixed character type. If she is mad, you >>can tell right away and she can stay moody for quite a long time. >> >>You never have all her times, for she likes to work hard and also spent >>some spare times working for charity. You will see woman in this zodiac a >>"Volunteer" for camp, and if she is in a high society, she will most >>likely be a president or a V.P. of a "Club". She is a romantic and >>artistic, but being poor and unstable is certainly not in her dreams. Her >>beautiful >>imaginations need to be realistic, for failure is not in her plan. >> >>A Goat always climb high, so either she start from a low point or a high >>point, she will make sure at the end she will have the best spot. She will >>not show her ambition, but she will show that she satisfy with herself >>now. Once you look back she already moved up again , quietly but sure. >> >>If she is your love one, be supportive and understand her. She is >>stubborn, but she will listen. She will act like a gentle fragile person, >>but in fact she can stick you down like a super glue without you knowing >>it.

i want/i need.

air. love. food. air. air. air.

On the return trip from Compass Point yesterday, I had felt immensely lonely. Normally I love traveling in the bus alone. I love the feeling of knowing I’m going somewhere, that I’ve a destination, and the fact that i'm alone makes me feel that i'm self-dependent. For those short moments in the bus, I feel like all the cars going by, everyone had a place to go, something to do. But yesterday was different, I felt all alone, I know no one else out there, but everyone else out there seem to know someone. I hate that kind of feeling, and perhaps i do know why I am feeling that way.

I’ve been losing a lot of friends. Friends who meant a lot to me. It’s so ironical that I’d managed to make everyone angry with me, when I’d tried so hard to be a nice person. Perhaps I tried too hard. *LOL* I always tell myself how everyone else’s opinion of me isn’t important, what matters is that I know I‘m right, that I only have to be answerable to my own actions. But perhaps it’s just human that one doesn’t like to be dimmed the social outcast, to be misunderstood of their characters., etc.. I simply don’t like the feeling of knowing that someone out there hates me, someone out there held unjust opinions of me. Sometimes I can picture, when I die, all the people around me will be there rejoicing over my death. What a scary thought.

Maybe I think and worry too much. But it’s still a fact that friends are constantly entering and leaving my life. No one stays. I fear that when I’m old and I look back on my past, all I have are memories of people leaving me. Fuck, why the hell do I always worry so much??! *Shudders* I hate it especailly when people tell me, there's no suck thing as an everlasting friendship. I beg to differ from that opinion. I know that if we can just try, somehow, sometime, we'd all be able to find everlasting friendships. There is only person who actually believe in me that i'd be able to have everlasting friendship, and I love him for that. (Thanks for believing in me, if you're reading this.)

Friday, April 18, 2003 at 11:22 AM

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